2-fer
Wordplay! No Apologies …
Every
now and then it’s good to step away from the norm and explore where few men and
women dare to go … the subtleties
of the English language.
It’s
happened to the best of us—and of late, the worst. Confronted with criticism or
need of defense (think negative viral
Twitter rants), we stammer apologetically or backtrack hypocritically.
These days, rarely do we “own” our statements.
This
points to a seldom explored problem of our language. Too many times we speak
without thinking (again, Twitter), or knowing,
the vital difference between two similar words. One can be weak and defensive,
the other strong and decisive. Shouldn’t you know the dissimilarity?
When
confronted, do you make an …
EXCUSE: (ek skyōōsʹ)
n. – 1) a plea in defense of or
explanation for some action or behavior, [i.e.] apology; 2) a release from
obligation, duty, etc.; 3) something that excuses …; 4) a pretended reason
for conduct, [i.e.] pretext … well, you get the idea! [2-fer WW #98; bolding and underline are mine.]
OR offer a logical …
REASON: (rēʹzɘn) n. – 1) an explanation or justification of an act, idea, etc.; 2) a
cause or motive; 3) the ability to think, form judgments, draw conclusions,
etc.; 4) sound thought or judgment, [i.e.] good sense; 5) normal mental powers,
[i.e.] a sound mind, sanity … wow. [2-fer WW #98.]
While often used interchangeably to clarify a
comment or action, according to Webster, these are two
very different words. One is a pathetic
pretense, the other is resolute in its logic and strength.
Many
of you who think you have a reason,
are truly offering only an excuse. Others are told to quit
giving lame excuses, when they actually have a valid reason.
Perhaps
it’s in the delivery. Have you thought of that?
If your
voice raises an octave or two in response (and yes, oddly enough that can also
be detected on Twitter), and sounds like it’s pinched between two four-hundred-pound
weights, even if you have a valid reason, it will be perceived as a
whiny excuse.
Consider carefully, the subtle differences between an excuse and a reason—which one best expresses the method to your madness? Or, is silence truly golden and no explanation is better than an excuse?
That
leaves your reason in the hands—and minds—of
others. If you don’t speak, others will squeak for you. (Yes, I meant “squeak.”
It will be their whiny excuse
offered in place of your possible good reason.)
We
all know the adage “think
before you speak”* (or act). Oh, so much easier said than done! Alternatively,
know that what you’re saying could be
misconstrued and be ready with your reason for saying it—a well thought
out and logical motive. (Well, it is in your
mind anyway. J)
The
best defense of word or action is confidence in your reasons. Give them
credence and validity, with a firm, calm voice and viable justification.
Want
to be taken seriously in your job, relationship, or dreams? Provide a
substantial reason, not an erratic excuse.
Word Challenge: EXCUSE or REASON? You’ll
enjoy life more without excuses, when you own your reasons. Have fun
applying these very different words to your week of inexcusable writings.
*This is an especially poignant comment on
bullying and not thinking before speaking; an article by Jill Tomac, “Think
Before You Speak: 5 Ways to Help You Choose Your Words Wisely,” on Maria
Shriver’s website, Igniting Architects of Change.
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